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Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat, and it’s time for every website and business in the world to trot out their holiday-themed kitsch.

I don’t actually mind this phenomenon. I kind of enjoy it. Tacky, campy things amuse me and holidays make me happy, so tacky, campy, holiday-themed things are right up my alley.

sexy-christmas-costumeThat said, I won’t be doing any Christmas-themed stories this year. No way, nuh-uh.

Call it laziness, if you like. I enjoy looking at other people’s Christmas light displays but I don’t put up my own; I’ll read a “Naughty Santa Girls” story but I don’t write ’em.

My family was always big on holidays, so maybe I’ve just gotten used to being pampered for them. Or maybe that familial association makes writing sexy holiday things a little weird for me (know thyself).

Or we could just chalk it up to my general perversity and desire to always be doing something different. Either way, I will not have any mistletoe seduction scenes for you this year, and not a single candy cane is going to go in unusual places!

But I will have a few new titles before the holidays, god willing and the creek don’t rise. I’m not sure any are ones you’d really give as gifts, exactly, unless you’re in a very understanding relationship with someone, but…a little holiday treat for yourself, perhaps? Something to enjoy while you stuff your own stocking, hur hur hur.

I promised a December free of Christmas stories, not Christmas jokes…