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As most of my American readers know, yesterday was Memorial Day, and we’ll just pretend that its observance is why my post is a day late, and that it is nuh-uh no way because I was staying with a bohemian lover who doesn’t have internet access at her pillow-filled love nest of an apartment!

Now, I am on a fairly slow release schedule myself. I drop one book a month, usually right at the end of the month (and you may have noticed that one of those is coming up, so yes, stay tuned).

But I know there are writers out there who are much more prolific, and who do shorter works that are easy to adjust for seasonal themes. Which got me to thinking yesterday — sure, we see all sorts of Christmas-themed erotica (mistletoe, “stocking stuffer” jokes, etc.), and maybe some St. Patty’s ones here and there, but can’t all holidays lend themselves to some irreverently naughty themes?

I didn’t have a desk calendar on me at the time. But I do now, and flipping through the rest of the year, all sorts of entertaining possibilities just spring to mind:

June

June 16 – Father’s Day – daddy/daughter or daddy/son incest, male-focused impregnation; expecting father/pregnant mother pairings

June 21 – Summer Solstice – fertility/impregnation themes, outdoor sex; pagan/primitive scenes

July

July 4 – Independence Day (US) – public sex at the firework displays!

September

September 4 – Labor Day (US) – dirty hands, class barrier taboos (possibly with racial overtones as well); pregnancy/childbirth scenes (‘cuz “labor,” duh)

September 21 – International Day of Peace – interracial, obviously!

September 22 – Autumn Solstice – pregnancy (from the summer solstice celebrations, perhaps), outdoor sex (last fling in the leaves!); older partners

October

October 14 – Columbus Day – interracial European/Native American sex, colonial scenes; enslavement

October 31 – Halloween – monsters, costumes; supernatural

November

November 11 – Veteran’s Day/Armistice Day – military themes, widowing/cuckolding scenes; necrophilia (all that “laying” in Flanders fields, you know)

November 28 – Thanksgiving – family incest, food play; Native American interracial

December

December 21 – Winter Solstice – snow/ice play, elderly partners; necrophilia

December 25 – Christmas Day – all the usual suspects (mistletoe in funny places, candy canes in similarly funny places, etc.)

December 31 – New Year’s Eve – drunken/dubious consent scenes; infantilism (all those girls in diapers pouring champagne and such)

Looking back over it, it’s rather an americentric list, no doubt because I was working with an American calendar. Perhaps my international readers could chime in with more holidays?

I think writing to each and every one of the holidays is a task for a more prolific writer than me. But the saucy irreverence of finding erotic themes in even the minor, busman’s-holiday sorts of celebrations entertains me.

Got your own dirty holiday themes to add? Leave a comment and chime in! I’m not publishing fast enough to steal your ideas, I promise.